marcus's daily(?) rant

8.20.2005

prepare

ok, so becca and i took our prepare/enrich test today. for those of you who have no idea what i'm talking about, i'll explain. the "prepare" test (for short), is a test used in premarital counseling to assess a couple's compatability and determine which areas of the relationship need work. it has a whole bunch of statements covering various aspects of the relationship, and you have to fill in one of five choices:

  1. strongly agree
  2. agree
  3. undecided
  4. disagree
  5. strongly disagree
it's kind of like the sat for engaged people. except there are no "wrong" answers. however, becca is a counselor/therapist and on many, many occasions given this test to couples seeking counseling from her. she knows what kind of results we don't want to get. she knows which answers would be (not wrong but) bad answers. so i'm pretty sure she cheated. i mean, how objective can you be if you already know the answers? i was honest. for the most part.

anyways, i was sitting there taking this 168 question test, and something occured to me. becca and i don't need this. there were questions about families, children, household roles, sex, spirituality, equality, finances, and the list goes on. but through all these questions it started to become clear to me that bec and i would be fine. any minute doubts i might have had before, just faded away. because i know what answers she would've put down. not because they were the right ones, but because they were the honest ones. i know it's cliched, but we are perfect for each other. so, let her cheat. we'll be fine.

oh, here's one of the questions: we are flexible in our lifestyle.

what the heck does that mean? it's so vague that i didn't know how to answer it. a lot of the questions were either so vague like this one or so absolute, i had to pick undecided. if you understand what that means please enlighten me.

posted by marcus at 23:54

2 Comments:

  • This is a truly confusing question. I don't understand it either. Amanda and I did the pre-marital counseling and while it was good to sit and talk about things openly, I'm not sure how much it prepared us for marriage. Jason, my brother, you know is a Marriage and Family Therapist. he said that he thinks that post-marriage counseling is a way better idea because that is when you are really going to start getting into each other's heads. We didn't do that, mainly because we were living in Fort Worth with no money to pay for it.

    But those questionaires were the wierdest. I tried to be open minded, but I couldn't help but think that it was only a couple steps away from a Cosmo quiz.

    By Blogger Kyle, at 23 August, 2005 17:06  

  • thanks, diggs. i whole-heartedly agree and that's why i'm marrying her, i guess. however, i don't know how much of the change in me is her doing, God's doing, my doing or just coinicidence. the year plus before bec & i met were pretty dark and depressing for me. think of your beginning of 2005, but stretched out over 15 months and a little less drama. in april 03 i had had enough and was beginning to come out of my funk/quarter-life crisis. and in may, i met bec. God has perfect timing. a couple of months earlier and i wouldn't have been ready for a relationship with her. i got lucky.

    By Blogger marcus, at 28 August, 2005 02:21  

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